Howeberry

From adulthood to parenthood, or something like that…

Nesting or simply organizing?

I have been terribly neglectful of my lovely baby-blog and have no excuse other than I’ve been busy!

This will be my fourth week home on maternity leave. I have been busying myself with last minute baby purchases, laundering and preparing cloth diapers and baby clothes, and finding homes for things like those adorable baby clothes (because they can’t live in storage forever!). I’ve also been busy spoiling my husband by cooking him breakfast nearly every morning I’ve been home, preparing his lunches, and arranging or making dinner. And since I’ve decided little Howeberry will be rooming in with us for at least the first 3 months, Jason has more time to work on the nursery (more on that story later).

So what does all this organizing look like?

Basically it looks like a book shelf that’s been converted into a dresser:

The mess of clothes on top are my maternity clothes, since they do not fit into my own dresser and are best kept separate.

The bottom two shelves are bins ready to cover baby’s butt, literally. The very bottom two are filled to the brim with cloth diapers, neatly folded and waiting to be used.

The bins above contain prep items such as cream and wipes: disposable for taking care of newborn meconium and cloth for the easier to clean poop that baby will be producing later. And probably my favorite thing I’m waiting to use on baby is in the bin next to the prep-bin, which are my lovely diaper covers. In particular, my wool diaper covers. These are only water resistant due to the lanolin they’ve been prepped with, but they are so very soft! I probably will not be able to use them until baby’s cord falls off, but they are ready and waiting until that time.

The top row of baskets is full of those beautiful baby clothes we’ve been collecting, whether on our own or from our wonderful friends and family. Particular items have been set on top to identify them as baby’s first outfit.

Everything is clean and ready whenever Howeberry is ready.

And then there is the rest of the stuff. It’s still very much in an organized mess in the living room. Car seat included (which, at 5 days until my due date, should really be in the car, but we have time. Right?). The cradle is still in the three boxes they shipped in from Mom and Dad. The rocking chair is also still in the basement and the cushion covers still need to be cleaned.

But somehow, I’m not too concerned.

My help will be here next week to assemble the cradle and move the last items to our bedroom. The stack of baby books will someday have a home in the baby room. And hopefully we’ll find a suitable place for the stroller, which may end up being the back of a car. We have oodles of blankets, most of which have been washed, along with the baby towels. Again, they just need a home.

All this cleaning and organizing has taken place over the last several weeks.

However, I would say I had one day of a primal sort of nesting since I’ve been home. That was last week when I took Windex to my kitchen and discovered: how clear and reflective I can make the windows in my back door; how white the back door actually is; and how reflective the black microwave  and dishwasher can become.

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Information Overload

In the last month or so we have been absorbing all sorts of information on labor and birth.

It started with the desire for a doula, a professional support person who could advocate for me during birth. Everything I had read pointed to the benefits of a doula, but this article really drove it home, and was a good resource to direct the husband to: The Doula Business printed in Seattle Woman Magazine. And so began my search.

The second doula I interviewed suggested we take her childbirth class so we would have a better understanding of what we were in for. As I mentioned in my previous post, our first class was amazing. She began introducing us to the Bradley Method of coping and relaxing through labor, and was more informational than any of the hospital birth classes we had attended to that point.

We spent the second week too sick to leave the house. The third week one of our classmates went into labor 6 weeks early, thus class was canceled (our teacher was attending the birth as her doula). In the meantime, my sis told me about the documentary on natural childbirth,  Orgasmic Birth, which we rented and watched, and I worked on my required reading for the childbirth class.

Boy was all this an eye opener!

Take a few minutes to watch Birth by the Numbers, which was an extra on the Orgasmic Birth DVD. About the same time I read a Mothering magazine article about an Amnesty International report on rising US maternal mortality rates. Combined with my reading of The Thinking Woman’s Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer, and I’ve learned that one intervention preformed in a now traditional hospital birthing setting leads to another and another, and so on.

One example, if your water breaks and you go to the hospital, they’ll preform routine internal exams to check for dilation. The more internal exams they do after membranes rupture, the higher your risk of infection. If you are not dilating or contracting, they’ll start you on Pitocin, an artificial oxytocin to try to get things moving along. Apparently too much Pitocin can cause increased pain, which leads to an epidural. An epidural can lead to fever, which is generally a bad sign, so they jump to a Cesarian section. This, of course, is not without its own risks of infection and complications like any other surgery.

Nevermind that apparently they’re starting to link increased sustained use of Pitocin in labor to the increase of Autism.

Then there is that Orgasmic Birth video, where they looked at the pros of labor and delivery in the place where most people are comfortable, home. Home and unmedicated with a loving midwife, doula, the dad to be, and maybe another supporting family member. I’ve always wanted a home birth and this video (filmed completely in New Jersey, stress capital of the world, in my opinion) showed me that it could be done, even in the NY metro area.

So, at 34 and a half weeks, with only six weeks to go, I’m re-evaluating the professionals I want attending my birth. I don’t want to make the same mistake of others I’ve read about. Who have terrible first births for lack of knowledge that there is something better. I don’t want to lose control by stepping foot in a hospital, then having to fight with nurses and doctors to make sure no interventions are preformed against my will. I want to be comfortable and to feel safe in my surroundings during this rite of passage. Pregnancy and birth are natural processes of life, and I feel like I shouldn’t be placed under a microscope as long as baby and I are doing well.

After all, my family will be impacted by the birth of my baby and we will be paying the bill. Might as well be comfortable and happy with the where and how choices we’ve made to bring the new little person into the world.

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Another Check-up & Natural Birth Classes

Last Monday we had another check up with the doctor. At this visit we went over the usual stuff: urine test, blood pressure check, bump measurement and listened to the baby’s heartbeat.

Starting the last check up, our appointments are now scheduled for every other week. This has the unfortunate side effect of meaning it’s harder to get those wonderful first appointments.

At the appointment, the doctor said the glucose tolerance test showed I am slightly anemic. So I’m now on an iron supplement. Big key here to remember is iron and calcium do not mix, and it’s best taken on an empty stomach (so mixing doesn’t happen). This is difficult to do when you’re trying to keep calcium intake high for strong baby-bones and you’re a cheese addict (thanks, Mom! 😉 ). One week in and I’ve managed not to forget one pill. Yay!

The appointment was generally unexciting, as most check-ups are. However, this was the first time we actually remembered to write down our questions and bring them. Here’s what they were:

  • Q:  When does maternity leave generally start?
  • A:  Companies will generally not let leave start before four calendar weeks before your due date.

This means October 24th for me, which is a Sunday, so probably the Friday before. I’m still trying to figure out how to manage to travel with the hubby a few days before that…

  • Q:  Birth plans. Do they recommend them?
  • A:  We will respect your wishes. People tend to get too specific in their plan and don’t allow for much room for unexpected situations.

So come to the hospital with an open mind, but don’t be afraid to speak your wants & needs. Check.

  • Q:  How to they feel about doulas?
  • A:  They’re great if you can afford one.

Excellent! This more or less got Jason to agree hiring a birth doula would be a good idea. After all, neither of us have done this before, so having someone there to help direct is through the process and act as a buffer between the hospital staff and us would probably be helpful, if not invaluable. If you don’t know what a doula is, check out DONA.

In my search for a birth doula, and talking to a compassionate doula over the phone, it was strongly suggested we take a natural birth class in preparation. Lucky for us, she teaches such a lass and a new session was starting Monday. If we were interested, we just needed to let her know. She sent her brochure, I talked it over with the hubby, and we signed up.

Talking to Jason after the first class, he made a comment about how he feels more prepared after those two hours than he does after the two hospital classes we’ve taken. With 8 classes to go with the natural birth classes, and 3 hospital classes coming up, I’m tempted to cancel some of the hospital classes.

Now if only I could figure out when to start working on our assigned homework…!

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